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The hardest part of moving on is not the walking away, but the realization that I’m leaving behind the person I used to be when I was with you."

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"The Weight We Carry"

*"I wake up at 4 AM every day, not because I want to, but because the cold concrete floor of our small rented room seeps through my thin mattress, and there’s no point in trying to sleep anymore. My hands shake a little as I light the small stove – we have just enough charcoal left for today’s morning tea and one meal tonight.

My daughter, Lila, is seven years old. She doesn’t ask why we can’t buy new shoes for her broken ones, or why she only gets to eat rice with a tiny bit of salt most days. Instead, she helps me fold the clothes we washed yesterday in the public tap down the street, humming a song she learned from the neighbor’s radio. Last week, she came home crying because her teacher said she couldn’t take the final exam – we owed three months of school fees we simply can’t pay. I held her tight and told her we’d find a way, but I don’t know how.

My husband left two years ago, saying he couldn’t bear the weight of it all. I don’t blame him – sometimes I can’t bear it either. But I have Lila, and every time she looks at me with those bright eyes full of hope, I know I have to keep going. Yesterday, I found work sorting garbage at the local dump. It pays almost nothing, and my hands are already covered in cuts and bruises, but it’s something.

People pass us on the street and look away. They don’t see that I was once a teacher too, that I dreamed of building a better life for my family. Now, my only dream is to see Lila smile again like she used to, before hunger and worry took over her young face. Life isn’t fair, and it isn’t kind – but it’s still mine, and it’s still hers. That has to be enough."*



Would you like me to write another story with a slightly different focus, or perhaps adjust the tone to include a glimmer of hope for the future?

Sungai air yang mengalir

The scenery is so beautiful and refreshing. My son is so comfortable and happy being here."