Wellbeing Wisdom

Wellbeing Wisdom is offering a free live discussion series for mental health professionals called Wise Talks. Our next speaker, on Thursday 10th September, 6-8pm, will be Brittany Wadforth, presenting on: Relational Adaptive Information: A Theraplay-Informed Framework for Adult Attachment Injury in EMDR Therapy

This is an online event. The Wise Talks series encourages participation and discussion, and events are not usually recorded. In the discussion series, I organise a speaker to lead a discussion about topics that are relevant to the treatment of trauma, and are often controversial in some way. Participants are invited to contribute to the conversation in a friendly and collaborative environment. This approach is founded in a belief that where there is controversy, there is something to learn, and a trust that as professionals, we can disagree cordially and come through it wiser than when we were certain.

About Brittany

Brittany is a Psychologist with over 10 years of experience across community, public, and private settings. She works with children and adults using evidence-based interventions, with a particular interest in trauma, complex trauma, dissociation, and attachment. Her approach integrates EMDR with neurobiological, trauma-informed, and relational frameworks.

About the Talk

Theraplay® is an evidence based attachment intervention originally developed for children and caregivers to support safe, connected and emotionally attuned relationships. This presentation explores how the core Theraplay dimensions of Structure, Engagement, Nurture and Challenge can offer a helpful framework for EMDR therapists working with adults impacted by attachment trauma, relational difficulties and developmental injury.

MORE INFO AND SIGN UPS HERE: https://catherinehynes.net/training/

Perhaps it’s not obvious, but understanding our own temperament and sensitivities is a key part of having healthy relationships.

Why?
Because good relationships are about a good fit between ourselves and the other person. We need to know what we like, how we like to spend our time, and where we sit in terms of sensitivity, privacy, etc… so we can regulate ourselves well in relationships and choose people who resonate and fit well with us. Some temperaments are well suited to a broad range of other people, and some temperaments are more sensitive and require a specific fit. Rather than shoving yourself into spaces that don’t fit you, it’s easier to figure out who you are and where you fit, and work with that to find good fits for yourself.

Lionetti and colleagues have studied sensitivity, and divided the population into 3 groups, using a flower metaphor:
-Tulips, who have moderate sensitivity, and are somewhat responsive to the environment,
-Dandelions, who have low sensitivity, and thus thrive in a wide variety of environments,
-Orchids, who are highly sensitive to the environment

What kind of flower are you? You can do their measure here to find out: https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/

Reference:
Lionetti F, Aron A, Aron EN, Leonard Burns G, Jagiellowicz J & Pluess M (2018) Dandelions, tulips and orchids: evidence for the existence of low-sensitive, medium-sensitive and high-sensitive individuals. Translational Psychiatry (2018) 8:24

If you’re interested in the social implications of this, I have a blog on this topic: https://catherinehynes.net/healthy-relationships-and-complex-trauma-why-healthy-relationships-are-a-privilege/

I also have a course designed for clients that provides therapists with the psychoeducation that complex trauma survivors are missing about healthy relationships: https://wellbeingwisdom.thinkific.com/courses/healthy-relationships

DARVO is an acronym- its letters stand for a description of the behaviour or people who manipulate others when a problem is raised with them.

The manipulator will:
Deny the other person’s account, regardless of whether it’s based in fact
Attack the other person either directly or by reputational damage
Reverse
Victim and
Offender- switch themselves from the offending role to the victim role, making out the person raising the complaint as the offender, the person attacking

This concept was developed by Jennifer Freyd, and has been studied within her Centre: https://www.institutionalcourage.org/

Freyd, J.J.: (1997) "Violations of power, adaptive blindness, and betrayal trauma theory" Feminism & Psychology, 7, 22-32

If you recognise this pattern, then you have a problem relationship in your life that may need addressing.

If you’re interested in the social implications of this, I have a blog on this topic: https://catherinehynes.net/healthy-relationships-and-complex-trauma-why-healthy-relationships-are-a-privilege/

I also have a course designed for clients that provides therapists with the psychoeducation that complex trauma survivors are missing about healthy relationships: https://wellbeingwisdom.thinkific.com/courses/healthy-relationships

Many of us learned to use Fraser’s Table or a variation of it to work with people who have dissociative systems and internal conflict to resolve. It’s a great technique, especially if you do all the steps recommended by George Fraser in the original paper. ..But you may be aware that it doesn’t always go to plan…

The analogy I used to understand this is family therapy: In a highly dysfunctional family system, we don’t necessarily get everyone into the same room straight away. It may not be safe for everyone to be honest about their experience with the whole system present. Disclosures cause further conflict and increase risk some parts of the family system. And the same can be true of an internal system.

So how can we structure things safely to work through those inner conflicts?

What do you do?

I am offering an advanced level workshop on treating dissociation that covers tricky work like this, in Hobart on 4-5 of September, called Clarity is Complex Again: Advanced Parts Work Skills for Trauma-Related Dissociation.

EARLY BIRD PRICING is available until 31 July saving you $150Bookings are here: https://catherinehynes.net/working-with-dissociation-advanced-topics/

Curating your social circle is key to having healthy relationships:

Inner Circle: is usually small, and includes the most trustworthy people that we resonate well with. Nobody you don’t trust and whose company you don’t enjoy belongs in your inner circle.

Friends: are usually people that you also trust and resonate with, but is usually less familiarity with these people than with your Inner Circle, so there would be a little less open disclosure, a little more distance.

Acquaintances: this is where all the people that you have contact with but don’t yet know well, or the people that you trust and resonate less with are found. Often there are no bad feelings, just less closeness, and less disclosure with people in this group.

Not For Me is an important category in your social circles- these are people who you’ve established are not a good fit for you. This can be benign- there are no hard feelings, you just have really incompatible ways of being, or it can be more serious, if that person isn’t trustworthy, or isn’t safe for you, and you need to work to limit your dose of that person and protect yourself.

Assessing your social circle and how you feel about it is important to ensure that the right people are in the right spots for you. If you realise that you need to move some people out, or you have vacancies, this is an opportunity to make helpful changes to your social circle.

If you’re interested in the social implications of this, I have a blog on this topic: https://catherinehynes.net/healthy-relationships-and-complex-trauma-why-healthy-relationships-are-a-privilege/

I also have a course designed for clients that provides therapists with the psychoeducation that complex trauma survivors are missing about healthy relationships: https://wellbeingwisdom.thinkific.com/courses/healthy-relationships

I am so grateful to Bethany Brand and Ruth Lanius and their many colleagues, including Frank Corrigan for their incredible work advancing the treatment of dissociation. I have recently been taking their Finding Solid Ground training (https://www.findingsolidground.info/), which teaches therapists how to use the skills that were established in the world’s first RCT on dissociative disorders as helpful to people who dissociate.

On this course I learned something new about Grounding. I have always approached being grounded out of a trauma response (including a dissociated part) as a process of activating the frontal lobes. So, I’ve used strategies to enhance frontal lobe functioning. But Frank Corrigan teaches that using the brain stem function of locating the self in space gets underneath parts and is a key component of grounding. Grounding works best when you activate the brain stem AND the frontal lobes. Wow! So neat for a brain geek!

I am offering an advanced level workshop on treating dissociation that covers tricky work like this, in Hobart on 4-5 of September, called Clarity is Complex Again: Advanced Parts Work Skills for Trauma-Related Dissociation.

EARLY BIRD PRICING is available until 31 July saving you $150Bookings are here: https://catherinehynes.net/working-with-dissociation-advanced-topics/

Working with hostile parts of clients, parts who mimic our client’s perpetrators, can be one of the most confronting aspects of working with dissociation.

These parts often feel very separate to clients – not part of their self. This experience of separateness makes it difficult for clients to mindfully observe these parts in action, and develop co-consciousness with them. Perpetrator imitating parts can manifest therapy-interfering behaviour and can pose risks to clients through risky behaviour. Most therapists with experience treating dissociation advocate working with these parts as early as possible in treatment.

But how?

I have a tip sheet to help you formulate perpetrator imitating parts and develop your therapeutic strategy. If you sign up for the tip sheet, you’ll also get tips about working with dissociation and access to a webinar I did a few years back about how to do parts work.

Get the Free Tip Sheet here: https://mailchi.mp/81c1a8e9ea1f/landing-page-pi-parts

I am also offering an advanced level workshop on treating dissociation that covers tricky work like this, in Hobart on 4-5 September, called Clarity is Complex Again: Advanced Parts Work Skills for Trauma-Related Dissociation.

EARLY BIRD PRICING is available until 31 July saving you $150Bookings are here: https://catherinehynes.net/working-with-dissociation-advanced-topics/