50 Unbound

The kids are gone, but is the Magic gone too?

No one prepares you for how different the holidays look when the kids grow up and move away. As a military family, we spent 15 years moving from location to location and living thousands of miles from any relatives. We took this opportunity to create our own circle of family and friends and create new traditions. Now my children are adults and I will once again be discovering new ways to navigate the holidays.

This year there won't be any gifts under the tree, but I will still create a warm and festive environment for myself with decor throughout the house. Since it's for me, there's no rush to get it done, but I do set a cut off for myself. If it's not done, or it's not put up by Dec 15, then it's not going up. No one will know but me. If its not perfect... no one will know but me. If it doesn't bring me happiness or foster positivity within my life, then there is not reason enough to do it.

Celebrate this season in a way that brings you and those around you Peace. Leave the chaos in the past.



Photo of the tree in my office.

Don't let others define you. You know who you are. You are enough. If they say you're "Too much" or "Not enough" ignore them. Don't dim your light for anyone!

How many times have you reinvented yourself and started over? I remember growing up and thinking I was supposed to chose one career path and stick to it for the rest of my life until I retired. By the time I was 30, the world starting changing so quickly I knew right then that I'd have to be able to adapt and change with it. For me, aging has been about growth and self discovery, never stagnation.

Sometimes we have to leave the past behind us and start anew to heal. That doesn't mean we forget. This mean practicing radical acceptance and learning to move forward without trying to figure out "why" certain things are the way they are. It just means acknowledging those feelings and moving past them without fear or blame to forge better relationships. It means learning from life and meeting people where they are. This trip has been about renewal and becoming better. Its about loving myself and loving the dad I hadn't seen in 19 years. It's about "Ohana"

Let's talk about it
What is an expectation you were taught to live up to that you had to let go of as an adult?
I'll go first. Answer in the comments.

When was the last time you did something indepently and entirely for yourself? I'm not talking about as a couple or a friend group, I'm talking about going solo. What did you do entirely for you?

Give yourself permission to rest! You don't have to work yourself into exhaustion for the benefit of others. Take time to take care of yourself before you try to take care of others.