Jaebabylacy

There’s a difference between preserving tradition and preserving exclusion.
When we start reminiscing about the days when certain organizations only wanted women who had a particular “look,” we also have to be honest about what those beauty standards historically meant for Black women. Colorism, texturism, size discrimination, and respectability politics are not traditions we need to bring back.
If sisterhood, service, community, and excellence are the foundation, why should a woman’s dress size or whether she fits an outdated beauty standard determine whether she belongs?

Women should be allowed to talk about womanhood without the conversation immediately being redirected.
Talking about our bodies, reproductive health, motherhood, periods, misogyny, violence, discrimination, fertility, infertility, and the experiences that shape our lives does not mean we are attacking anyone else.
And throwing around words like “MAGA,” “alt-right,” or “TERF” doesn’t actually address the conversation being had.
We can respect trans people AND acknowledge that women have lived, sex-based experiences worth discussing. Those two things do not have to cancel each other out.
Why has simply talking about womanhood become so controversial?

Womanhood is more than how we look, dress, or express ourselves. It’s also the reality of moving through this world as women.
Our reproductive health matters. Our fight for bodily autonomy matters. PCOS, fibroids, maternal mortality, medical discrimination, sexual violence, FGM, and generations of women fighting for rights over our own bodies matter.
Acknowledging these experiences does not invalidate anyone else. But inclusion should never require women to minimize or erase the realities that have shaped our lives.
Womanhood includes the beautiful, the painful, the complicated, and everything in between. ❤️

The tragic death of Nolan Wells is a heartbreaking reminder that situational awareness still matters.

One of my biggest concerns is that many young Black men and women have grown up believing that because slavery and Jim Crow are history, they no longer need to think critically about the environments they're in. Some have been taught that everyone is safe, everyone can be trusted, and history has no relevance today.

Knowing history isn't about living in fear. It's about making informed decisions, recognizing risk, and understanding that not every space carries the same dynamics or dangers.

This conversation isn't about assuming the worst in everyone. It's about encouraging awareness, discernment, and wisdom. Those qualities can save lives.

Praying for Nolan Wells, his loved ones, and every family grieving an unimaginable loss.

Why is the responsibility for every issue in the Black community so often placed on Black women?

When conversations about homophobia, violence, broken families, or community leadership come up, why do Black women so often become the primary target of criticism instead of examining the roles and responsibilities of everyone involved?

This isn't about avoiding accountability. It's about asking why accountability seems to fall so unevenly.

Curious to hear your thoughts. Let's keep the discussion respectful.

Two grown men stood on a stage, and one spent his entire rap battle mocking another man’s little daughters because they were dark-skinned.

Calling little Black girls ugly, comparing how many likes they receive, and discussing which child will be “picked” by men is beyond colorism. It is disturbing.

These are babies. Why are grown men already measuring their worth by male attention, calling them degrading names, and predicting which one will be more desired?

This is what self-hatred looks like when grown adults project it onto innocent children. Black girls deserve protection, not to be used as punchlines.

Modesty isn’t something you can force onto another woman. It’s a personal conviction, and true modesty begins in the heart. 🤍
We all have different convictions, different journeys, and different relationships with God. Encouraging one another is one thing, but policing other women isn’t our job. Real transformation starts from within, not from a dress code.
Do you believe modesty is primarily about the heart, outward appearance, or both?

Not every standard Black institutions set is about appeasing white people. We have to stop treating whiteness as the measuring stick for every conversation. HBCUs have the right to create the culture they want to cultivate, and having a dress code doesn’t automatically equal respectability politics. There’s nothing wrong with expecting students to present themselves in a certain way in an educational setting. Standards aren’t always oppression.

Too many women are taught that the goal is to build a life around attracting, keeping, or being funded by men. But what happens when that becomes your entire identity?

I think Brittany Renner’s story is a reminder that centering your life around male validation or male provision can leave you feeling lost when those things change. A relationship, money, or attention should never replace purpose, peace, or building a life of your own.
What do you think? Is society teaching women to prioritize getting tricked on by men over themselves?

After watching Doja Cat & Latto’s new music video, I couldn’t help but wonder: Why is it acceptable when dark-skinned Black men are portrayed as servants or background props for racially ambiguous women, but we’d likely have a very different conversation if the dynamic were reversed?

I’m less interested in outrage than I am in consistency. If we believe representation and power dynamics matter, then they should matter regardless of who’s in the spotlight. Curious to hear your thoughts.