Rusty Osborne

I tend to avoid drama.

I don’t like petty situations. I hate blaming and complaining. I just want things handled better.

But last week I watched this movie called The Drama. It’s by A24, they make some really great movies. (But I won’t watch their horror movies. Just can’t do it.)

Even back in high school, when everyone was dramatic, I would usually just walk away when someone started s**t or wanted to gossip.

Anyway, this movie The Drama was a drama about drama. And I loved it.

Without spoiling anything for you, here’s what you can take away from it.

All the characters have flaws. Which is normal because they’re human. But one of them almost did something really terrible.

The whole movie, all the other characters are judging that one character the most. Because “I can’t believe she would even think about doing that!”

Along the way, each of the other characters are kinda s**theads. They lie. Gossip. Cover up for others’ mistakes. And never taking any accountability for their own actions.

This movie lit me up. I was pumped afterwards. Because I hope that the people who watch it start to realize that we all do that.

We all judge. We all do stupid things. But do you actually realize what you’re doing, and change it?

If you want an entertaining way to see psychology at play (or if you just like drama) you’ll probably enjoy it.

P.S. Robert Pattinson and Zendaya are the main characters. Great actors in my opinion. I like watching people who’ve mastered their craft. I’ll watch pretty much anything with Matthew McConaughey. They all inspire me to be masterful in my work too. Ok, less TV, more work, see ya.

“If you don’t choose your donut, I’m buying a dozen.”

That’s what I told Nikki when we both were craving a sweet treat. But I was in the “f*ck it zone.” You know, where you don’t care much so you just say “f*ck it” and eat or drink or smoke whatever you want?

Well Nikki chose her 1 donut… But I told the person “We’ll take the dozen.”

I’d love to say that I’ve conquered every vice. That my whole life is adventure, millions of dollars raining down, and peace and ease daily. But that would be a lie. And I don’t like to lie. I want to show what’s really going on.

Other gurus put on a front. They show the shiny and ideal version of themselves. Which is honestly fine. It’s really helpful to see the “ideal” version of people. So we have an ideal to aim towards.

But I’ve been blessed with the ability to share my stories. Even when they’re embarrassing. So I do that.

My hope is that it makes the work more human. More tangible. Less magical (even though it is pretty magical). So that you’re inspired to just use the work. Do the work. And become better.

If I try to appear too far ahead of you in life, you might compare yourself to my journey in this inner work and think “I could never get there.” Which would also be a lie. I just do the work daily, and tell people about it. You can do it too.

Ok now back to the story and the lesson…

After we ordered the donuts, I knew I had some inner work to do. Because this is not characteristic of me. Or at least not the me that I want to be. I think. So when we got home, I grabbed my phone and went for a walk. I used the Habit Indifference AI Protocol (from the Habit Indifference Method). It showed me that I had some subtle shame and unworthiness, which I hadn’t seen before.

Then I pressed play on a meditation designed for releasing bad habits and distractions. And by the end, I had new inspired actions to take. I was really excited to go to bed, so I could wake up early and build my business. I didn’t have another donut that night. Continued in the comments…

Thanks to my wife, I now know to just not renew my license.

Get angry.

People don’t always like that I say it.
But seriously. Get angry.

Get angry that you’re not further along.
Get angry that you’ve held yourself back.
Get angry that you’ve let yourself stay stuck in the same problems for too long.

Because anger creates action.

Not all angry actions are helpful. So use your brain too.

Use your anger to start something new.
To begin a new system.
To break an old paradigm.

Get fu***ng angry.

Sadness will leave you mopey and still.
Grief will keep you sad and in one place.
Even gratitude for a problem won’t solve it. (Sorry positive thinkers.)
Get mad. Do something about it.

You don’t have to stay mad.

But get mad enough to get yourself out of the issue. For real.

Perfectionism is a bitch.

Because two things are happening in your brain at the same time.

On one hand, you want to do a great job. You like doing a great job.

But on the other hand, you need to get it done. Faster. Because you have so much more you need to
do.

Can you do both? Is it possible?

It’s possible. You’ll find your way to do it. But only after you heal the mental block that’s causing it.

Your need to be perfect came from somewhere.

It showed up when you were young to keep you safe. Safe could mean physically safe. Like you’d get hit if you weren’t perfect.

Or maybe it kept you socially safe. Like you’d get made fun of if you weren’t perfect.

So if you go back and heal that root cause memory, you’ll learn more about how to be perfectly
imperfect.

Because you know what’s worse than doing something bad?

Not finishing it at all, because you tried to get it perfect.

What I don’t want you to know about me today…

I spent over $150 on chocolate products and cookies in the last two weeks.

I lost sleep because I was busy playing video games while eating those cookies.

And I didn’t want to work yesterday because I lost that sleep.

So I sound like the best “high performer” to learn from right now 😬

Here’s why I did those things. I’m testing a new idea this month called “acceptable failures.”

I learned that some really successful people choose what to fail at. They know which ball they’re going to drop. And they drop it.

So I decided that this New Rusty will eat more sugar than normal. Which led to worse recovery and lower will-power. Sooo the cookies and late nights got to me. Oops.

But New Rusty also is not drinking. Not watching TV with dinner. And he’s working harder on his business this season than the last few.

There’s a few friction points… but they’re worth the trade off.

My marriage is better and deeper. My faith is better and deeper. I’m physically stronger because my workouts have been on point. And my business is bringing in more moolah than before.

Think about it - You know what to do but you’re not doing it. Right?

You’ve got to start working more ON instead of IN your business.

You’ve got to finally build out the new products, write the book, put yourself first.

You’ve got to do the work you’ve been putting off for so long, because more urgent things are taking your time and focus.

But your success doesn’t wait for that.

It’s on the other side of right action.

When I was fat, I had a good idea. I didn’t have too many of those at the time, so this was exciting.

I’d do what the skinny people were doing.

They were skinny. I wasn’t. So I figured I’d just follow their lead.

They ran on the beach. So I started running on the beach.

After a while, I hurt myself from running too much while fat. I didn’t know I had to strengthen my muscles and joints to support all the fat I was carrying.

So if I couldn’t run, what could I do? I knew skinny people ate healthier than me. So I decided to fix my nutrition.

That’s when things really took off. But I did one thing different this time.

I didn’t try to just manifest a healthy body. I didn’t visualize my skinniest or most muscular self.

Instead I said to myself “I’m going to be the healthiest person you’ve ever met.”

So then my only job was to do what a healthy person would do. If I had two choices, I’d just ask which was healthier. It was easy.

The point here is that most people that want to manifest a bunch of money or a dream business are looking in the wrong place.

If you’re only visualizing the final thing, you’d have to have a ton of imagination and action to get there.

But for mere mortals like me, I needed some smaller steps. Something easier to manage. Like “Who do I want to be? Who would naturally have the results I want?”
I knew a healthy person would weigh less. So I’d rather be healthy.

So, over to you…

What kind of person would you need to be, who’d naturally have what you want?

Think on that one. And tomorrow I’ve got something to help you do this.

I’ve got some introspections to throw your direction.

1. Go outside.
If you feel anxious, go outside. Depressed? Go outside. Feeling good? Go outside.

2. Nature heals.
It may not be instant, but enough time outside and you’ll see new solutions to your problems.

3. Chemicals impact your brain.
For me, decaf hikes have more nature appreciation. Caffeinated hikes solve more business problems (but sometimes come with more anxiety).
If you don’t experiment, you don’t know your options.

4. Brain impacts your chemicals.
If you spiral on anxious thoughts, you’ll stir up more cortisol. Which will blow through your adrenal hormones and cause burnout faster.
But your thoughts are what start that spiral. Solve the thoughts, you’ll calm your nervous system faster.

5. The higher you fly, the more grounded you need to be.
The weeks that I have tons of free time, I can skip more meditations and still feel amazing.
But the weeks that have lots of work to do, I do two meditations per day. So I stay grounded, clear, and inspired.

6. Create more ceremony around your work.
Say a little prayer before you work. Take a deep breath before you start zoom. Say “thank you” when you close up for the day.
It’ll ground you, and keep you more present. So the day doesn’t fly by without you realizing it.

That’s what’s on my mind today. I’m practicing these things and thought you’d find them useful.

Most people are sitting on problems they’ve had for years.

“I can’t let people know how bad my finances are.”
“I’ve been dealing with this health issue for years!”
“My husband and I don’t really talk anymore, it’s been a long time since we really connected regularly.”

One day, the pain of the problem gets so bad that you finally do something about it…
But what keeps us from seeing the problem and the solutions to it sooner?

It’s pretty simple. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

Think about this: the thing that makes you FINALLY say enough is enough is… what? Do you know? I do.

Pain.

Once the pain is strong enough, you move. It’s biological and psychological. You can’t help but move or change when the pain feels bad enough. But then why do some people let problems fester so long?

They’ve figured out ways to not feel the pain.

Avoidance. Distractions. Bad habits. Addictions. Numbing.

So if you want to change your big problems faster…
Or if you want to see your problems when they’re small, and change them before they’re big…
You got one job.

Feel.

Get present to the pain, and feel it. For real. Is it uncomfortable? Duh. It’s pain.

But tune in! Don’t tune out.

P.S. I’m flabbergasted by how much energy and life I’ve felt since I stopped watching TV two weeks ago. I had no clue how much it was sapping my energy. Cutting out worse habits gives back even more.

And gives me more time to reflect on the Into the Wild Within Retreat in Iceland. .within

This winter was a bust.

We hardly got any snow. I mean, when it hit, I enjoyed it… but it was so minimal compared to the past few years here.

I spend a lot of time wishing for better. Like, when you give me a bowl of vanilla ice cream, I’ll eat it while thinking about how it would be better with chocolate syrup. Instead of enjoying the vanilla fully.

So now that spring is in full swing here — full of birds, bees, battlestar galactica (jk i’m not watching TV right now) — I’m having to remind myself to ENJOY IT.

The trees went from bare, to blooming flowers, to shedding flowers in like 2 weeks. It goes by so fast.

So I’m working on remembering this lesson in my life and in my business:

Embrace the season.

I’m in a season where I’m coaching a lot. I’m spending more time on zoom than I’ve done in a long time.

And I’m really enjoying it right now.

But there’ll be a time where I won’t have all these calls. I’ll have another business model built, or hell maybe a whole different business.

And that’s when I’ll look back and remember how great this season was… IF I embrace it fully now.

Even if you’re in a rough patch - can you embrace it? Surrender to the s**ttiness of it, and learn from it?

Or if life is great - surrender and feel how great feels now?

Everything ends.

Embrace what you’ve got while you’ve got it. (Rusty, I’m talking to you.)