Secret Sauce Angel

The beauty of spicy stories is that they don’t stay on the page. They come back as sparks of excited aliveness, later…

While you’re making tea.
While you’re getting dressed.
Commuting.
Or supposedly thinking about something productive, or sensible.

I love that… The freedom to read something simply because it turns you on. To enjoy being rrrotic not for anyone else, but for yourself. To let your imagination have somewhere exciting and daring to go.

Pleasure can begin with nothing more dramatic than a book and the willingness to enjoy what happens in your head.

Come read this one with me ❤️‍🔥

The link to Ava’s Switch is in my stories and highlights.

When a couple says they want sx a different amount, they often arrive with a number they’re trying to agree on. How often would be reasonable? Once a week? Twice? Somewhere in the middle?

But the more interesting difference isn’t how much each of them wants. It’s what each of them counts as worth wanting.

One partner might be quite happy to have sx that’s just fine. The contact is part of the point. Fine still feels worth having.

For the other, eventually, fine may stop being a good enough reason to get undressed.

That can look like lower desire. But what if, sometimes, it’s a need to raise the bar?

Low desire has many possible roots — pain, medication, hormones, exhaustion, stress, unresolved resentment, things that happened long before this relationship. All of them deserve proper attention.

But sometimes the sx has stopped being compelling enough. It’s something predictable, neither of them quite knows how to make it better, and eventually one person becomes “the low-desire one”.

The trouble with the label is that it can shut down the question just as it gets interesting. Because the person who wants less of this may be capable of wanting considerably more of something else. More play. More anticipation. More surrender. More time. More variety. More transformation. Something neither of them has language for yet.

So the goal isn’t to help couples match their numbers. It is to find out what much better intimacy would actually mean for each of them — not a compromise in the middle, but something each of them would really enjoy.

Before you negotiate how often, ask a different question:
What would your partner say yes to instantly?

“I’m terrible at texting, but I really like you.” We spend so long trying to talk someone into the version of themselves they described when trying to make an impression. Intentions are.. cute. But behaviour is what’s actually real, and once you learn to trust it, you can stop interrogating, hoping, building a case, waiting.

People are usually showing you who they are — and exactly how much capacity they have for you. The question is, is that what you want? Or would you rather be somewhere else?

Sometimes relationship work can turn into self-abandonment ⬇️

Can I give this to myself? Can I soothe myself instead of asking for reassurance? Can I build a life I love instead of waiting to be made happy?

Good questions. I ask versions of them all the time.

The danger if that is, we may start treating needing something from another person as something you’re supposed to grow out of. But what if you’ve done all of the work — and still want more from someone?

More affection. More curiosity. More time. More effort. More choosing.

Of course you can run your own life. But being in relationship includes receiving from somebody else.

So what would “enough” actually feel like for you in a relationship?

We did it ✨ Pleasure expansion session has been filmed 🎥

International Labour Days used to be all about time off and BBQs. This time we were wired on excitement, full moon energy, and a sugar rush — and finished at 3am ⚡️

Your on-demand pleasure session is coming soon…
once we’ve slept a bit and edited it to our liking 🥰